I Have Discovered the 9th Habit
First there were the Seven Habits of highly effective people [LINK], then there was the 8th Habit[LINK]. For years people have searched for ways of being more effective and thus saving that most valuable commodity; Time.
In the movie “The Fly”, Martin Brundle keeps a closet stocked with numerous copies of exactly the same clothes just to avoid having to think about what to wear.
Well I am here to tell you that that is all well and good but I believe now I have found the answer. The single thing that will free up SO MUCH time you will wonder why you ever even TRIED to live differently. So what is it? What is the answer for which people have search the ends of the earth???
Cut…..your own…..hair.
There you have it folks. Take a second, breath it in. Yes, I’m saying cut YOUR OWN hair. Not only that, cut it down to 1/4 of an inch. Lastly, make every strand the same length.
That’s it. I have been doing this for 4 weeks now and it’s changed my life. Here are just some of the benefits:
- I have more energy from carrying less weight around on my head.
- I burn more calories with the increased need to keep my head warm.
- In the hot summer air I expel heat quicker too, putting less of a strain on my system overall.
- I save time in the shower, as well as drying time.
- My hats fit better
- No more “bed-head”
- My posture has improved as I’m no longer weighed down by inches of useless hair.
- Lower center of gravity
- My pillow is better aligned to my spine when I lay down.
- No more getting sunglasses tangled up in my fringe
- Reduced drag; I can walk and run faster.
- I save time and gas driving to the barber as well as the cost of the haircut itself.
- No more annoying small-talk at the barber’s
I just gave myself a haircut Sunday night, it took 15 mins. Easy cleanup with a paper towel and a shower. No fee, no tip. No waiting in line. Best of all, I am finally in control. No more enslavement to the almighty follicle. Hair NEVER sleeps, it just keeps growing an growing. Even as you’re cutting it, it’s already growing back.
Well no more. Now I’M driving the bus. Do you have any idea how empowering that is?
*The image on this post is an artist’s depiction of the incredibly powerful flare that erupted from the red dwarf star EV Lacertae, April 25th 2008.
while i admire your thriftiness and desire for efficiency, i have question whether doing the same wouldn’t condemn me to a lifetime of singledom or at the very least, limit prospective partners to a) men with lots of piercings and tattoos or b) other women, neither of which sound particularly appetizing.